last night after shut down lappy azrul sampai. then keluar ahh. ryan takde :'( rindu diaa.. huhu.. but TG arisha adaa :'D pergi makan dulu kt kg. baru then lepak KLCC japp. pastu gerak dataran. hm.. i watched those rempz dari jauh. pastu tak sampai setengah jam, i walk straight to the car. then arisha dtg dgn heinken. perghh.. lama tak rasa.. haha.. dia ckp dia cilok dr bdk2 kt situ. gempak lah kau rishh..
she said, take it or leave it. mula2 tu cam tanak. i thought dia dh insaf rupanya tidak jugaaa -.-'' then minum je lahh.. sikit je pun. hm.. i cried waktu bagtau rishh apa yg berlaku this past few days.. pastu lentok.
this morning im up around 5. kinda shocked cz im not home yet. i was in proton waja. arisha wooo,, tido mati. my head really hurts and i saw azrul. he wasn't asleep yet. time tu kete parking kt 14. cmne boleh sampai situ? i hv no fckin idea. so he invited me to McD nk breakfast. i said okay but dia lah yg kena keluar duit. and we left arisha and abg nik tido dlm kete.(azrul cakap tfie followed her ex pg uptown d'msara)
so dia mcm suddenly tanya pasal atiqah. terkejut jugak cz sebelum ni dia tak ambik kisah pn :/ and he said stuffs that makes me realize where is that wrong part in our relationship. agak lahh. i cried. first time ott nanges dpn dia. malu tapi.. tu lahh.. i cried my heart out so badly.
he said he would like to help me by sending me to her house. but he said next time je lahh. lg pn dh pagi. my mum would freak out if she know whats happening. so im home and tak nampak kete kt porch. i know that daddy dh pergi kerja. but mummy? maybe she's out looking for me. so i sampai, pergi dapur, nmpak nasi goreng, terus redah. haha. rupanya mama gi hanta uni pergi sekolah. dia ada ikhtifal todayy~
so lepas kemas rumah, buat scone. bila buat tu kan, bau scone perghhhh.. sedap gilooo.. but when its eating time, terus cam takde mood :'( sebab asyik ingat, she asked me to do some for her also. so endup budak2 yg habis kan :'/
dari pagi i was hoping lagu far away plays through my phone; meaning ada incoming message. but harapan je lahh. lunch tadi pn tak makan apa cz asyik ingat kat dia jea. hm.. pastu mama paksa keluar bilik, makan petang. she's quite worried about me. demi menjaga hati mama, i get out and eat walaupun sikit.
susah nya hidup bila dia tak text. bila i tak tahu apa yg dia buat satu hari ni. she's just can't get out frm my mind. hm.. i was pissed at myself for being so childish. nk handle problem sendiri pn cam tunggang terbalik. so waktu i kemas bilik enn, katil pullout tu tersekat sbb the 'carpet' tu mcm terlipat. and i just ripped it off. i was so madd O.O bila dh siap kemas tu, i baring2 and hoping there's incoming message. kalau tak dari dia pn atleast please bunyiiiii T^T
tapi bila fike last night dia cakap jgn text dah, terus rasa macam downnn gilaa..
kenapa lahh aku ni jenis kuat sgt cemburu? kenapaaaa?? maybe im just tired played around by those i love. tapi kenapa perasaan risau ni cepat sgt dtg bila dia lepak dgn pmpuan lain -.- aihh.. apalahh kau ni adena -.-
pastu tadi lepak kt taman jaya. ambik udara. azrul was there too.. he forced me to text her. but im too embarrassed i dont know why.
i just miss you so much. i just wanna be with you. forget about those things i said. ignoring those words that i didn't meant. i want to see you soooooooo badly.. i don't want to live my life knowing that you're gone. knowing that you're out with someone else. maybe i just jealous cz i can't spend my time with you like dinie can. it hurts knowing if you need her more than you need me. maybe yguys r just friends. but i saw something else behind those words you called 'friends' goshhh adena whts wrong with you!!
i just want to stop crying by acting that im strong. but i was wrong. i am not strong without you. i just cant live my normal life if i know nothing recent about you. i'm just.. weak.
-worried girlfriend waiting for your text :'(
